Thursday, November 12, 2009

Take my advice - I'm clearly not using it

So having written about the value of a simple life, I had to laugh at myself today when I realised how darned busy I have been the last two days. Pair this hysterical busy-ness with a week of appalling sleep from our teething 8 month old and voila - its 8pm on a Friday night and I am already in my pyjamas and writing this from bed. On the verge of collapse, or at least tears, from exhuastion. (Yes, my husband is probably right that I am a tad melodramatic).

Why do I do this to myself? Even with the best of intentions to simplify my schedule I keep saying 'yes' and finding myself in a flurry of playdates.

I could ... should .... have postponed the back to back playdates today given the complete lack of sleep. My friends wouldn't have minded. I could have walked up the road, got a really strong takeaway coffee and headed to the library. The day could have been peaceful.

But instead this morning I frantically baked a big batch of cupcakes, organised some activities for the kids to do and tried to do the days jobs before visitors arrived 9.30. It then seemed I spent the whole day battling with Munchkin who is in a phase where she wants to 'whack' everyone and everything that frustrated her. Now, I'm behind on the washing, I don't have bags packed for our outings tomorrow and after dinner I had to quickly cook up a kilo of chicken so that it can go in the freezer before it spoils ... with Little Guy on my hip. A peaceful day would have been so much better for all involved.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the company. In fact, I crave company which is why I tend to do this to myself. But we all pay the price.

So this time, I'm taking my own advice - I'm off to sleep!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Simplify, Simplify, Simplify

I remember when I was at university I saw the book ‘Simplify your Life' by Elaine St James on the counter at the university bookshop. Despite my rather meagre student finances I bought it immediately and read the whole thing on the bus ride home. I was hooked. The notion of deliberately choosing a life that is ‘outwardly simple, inwardly rich’ resonated deeply. Since then, voluntary simplicity has been a driving value for me. I haven't always succeeded, but I have always aspired to live this way.

Now there is (of course!) a book called ‘Simplicity Parenting'. I haven’t read it but Grace has reviewed it very positively, and having read the first chapter on Amazon it certainly looks like a good read. It has got me thinking a lot about what ‘simple parenting’ means to me.

An old-fashioned childhood

I want my children to have an old fashioned kind of childhood … to climb more trees and watch less TV. To take all morning to get dressed, to read the same book 20 times in one day and to make forts with sheets over chairs in the lounge. To have one special doll and love her, not a collection of 40 Barbies and always be wanting more. To take all day to potter in the garden, or bake biscuits in the kitchen.

A stay at home mum

My life is simpler because we actually stay home a lot, rather than fill our days with playgroups, music classes, toddler gymnastics, play dates, and coffee groups. Our mornings are much calmer as there is no pressure to be anywhere. I don’t need to pack lunches and bags. I don’t need to pay fees or organise resources or sit on committees. Now we only have one car life is even simpler … if we can’t walk there in the pushchair, we can’t go! Plus, getting kids into the pushchair seems so much simpler than herding them in and out of carseats.

Avoiding mall trall

We try as far as possible to avoid the excesses of todays commercial culture (oooh, that sounds terribly self righteous). We don’t watch TV with the kids so they don’t see the ads for all the amazing toys. We try not to take them to malls and department stores, so they don’t see things to ask for. We try not to clutter our home with plastic junk. The odd time we do find ourselves in a K’Mart and experience the pester-power of a 3 year old we are quickly reminded of how much staying away keeps our life, and our home simple.

Beware the supermums

You know the supermums don’t you … the ones whose 2 year olds are already ‘preccious readers’ and are heading off to gifted programmes. The ones who anxiously teach colours, letters and numbers, agonise over each developmental milestone, and phone Plunketline twice a day to check everything out. These mums will stress you out … I tend to give them a wide berth!

Let go of perfectionism

My life is complicated by my ambition to be some of kind of perfect Waldorf mom who cooks biodynamic food from scratch, sews and knits and needle-felts and has nothing in the house that is formed or synthetic.

But for me, real life isn’t like that. Friends and family have different values, and I’d rather spend time enjoying my children than fermenting yoghurt. My heart broke the first time I saw how much Munchkin loved Dora the Explorer. It didn’t fit the picture in my head of what she ‘should’ be into … but that is my issue not hers.

And so when a loving aunty gave her a Dora doll for her birthday, and my grandparents gave her a Dora book I chose not to worry. Not to try to ‘hide’ the doll, or have a ‘little chat’ to the rellies about why we don’t have those things in our house. Instead, I bought her some Dora stickers to go with it and decided that life would be a lot simpler if I let go of my Waldorfy perfectionism.

We have even started watching the odd DVD here … I have three DVDs for Munchkin. She goes through stages of being quite into them, and when she’s having one of those days and Little Guy is refusing to settle they are a god-send. I am glad I fought the battle for as long as I did, but for me the decision to stop being a TV Nazi has made life a lot easier!

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this. What makes life at your place simple, or complicated?

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Monthly Roundup - October

It seems that a lot of us found October rough ... and I've just heard on the news that here in NZ we have had the coldest October is over 60 years! So ... roll on November and the summer weather that we hope will come with it.



October was a frenetic month here at Domestically Blissed, two lots of overseas visitors (not staying with me but lots of get-togethers), two lots of grandparents arriving from overseas, a bunch of birthday parties, hubby putting his back out ... AGAIN and to top it all off the whole family came down with a gastro bug ... ick!



I am pleased to say that I still managed to get a fair bit done ...



My goals for October were

- write 2 more 'areas of play' posts.
Result: Half pass ... wrote a post of music, still working on one on creativity!



- stick to grocery budget - strictly.
Result: Half pass again ... I overspent by $60 but we had a few dinner parties and then when I got sick we used a bunch of sposies. I think we can make it stick this month!



- bring Little Guys' baby book up to date.
Result: Oh, you guessed it - another half pass. I wrote a bunch of notes, sorted the photos and glued them in, and have decided to wait for another season of my life to do the final version.



-write list of Christmas gifts and stick to a maximum of $15 per person for gifts.
Result: PASS ... now I just have to stick to the list. I nearly bought 'off the list' today but managed, just, to stop myself (I think the shoplady thought I was mad)



- organise spare room wardrobe
Result: PASS ... and it is great. Even got hubby to put up a shoe rack that we got really cheap on TradeMe, and bought some wooden coathangers. Wardrobe bliss is mine .... and I got motivated to also organise the wall unit in our dining room.



- get at least 8 more listings up on TradeMe
Result: PASS PLUS ... 8 sales on TradeMe, 4 sales on another forum ... making a big difference to the last vestages of the pregnancy/new baby clutter.

So onwards and upwards ....

Well my goals for November are:

- keep an exact track of where the 'cash' part of our budget goes. Each week I get a little bit of spending money out, and each month it all goes - poof - into thin air. Time to track track track.

- buy all our Christmas presents except for the children.

- make Christmas mince, ready for making mince pies

- re-organise little guys wardrobe for summer

- another eight listings of second hand stuff on TradeMe.

So, what are your goals for November?

Friday, October 30, 2009

Lush love ... and how to clean the loo

I am still here ... I deserve some kind of award for this on again off again blogging! When life gets busy my computer time is the first thing that goes … but I’ll report more on that in my monthly wrap-up!

More interesting posts are planned … but while I work on those I thought I would share an excerpt from the wonderful Shannon Lush whose books 'Speed Cleaning' and 'Spotless' are my new favourites.

Her show has been on TV here lately, and while she's not the most charismatic television presenter, she's had me cleaning out the inside of our kettle (with CLR and a scourer), polishing the silver (washing soda and aluminium foil) soaking net curtains in napisan and generally using bicarb (baking soda), vinegar and clove oil with gay abandon!

Her books are so detailed, she even gives precise instructions to a task most of us don't give much thought to ...

'How to Clean the Toilet'

(with two sponges, white vinegar, baking soda and a bowl of hot water).

1. Flush the toilet to wet the sides of the bowl.
2. Sprinkle bicarb soda over the inside of the bowl.
3. Wipe the top of the cistern
4. Wipe the top of the lid, under the lid, the top of the seat and under the seat using bicarb and white vinegar and the two sponge technique.
5. Splash white vinegar over the bicarb in the bowl, then use a toilet brush to scrub, including up and around the rim.
6. Wipe the top of the rim with a sponge that’s been dipped in vinegar
7. Wash the sponge in hot water and wipe rim again.
9. Flush
9. Rinse the sponge in white vinegar and wipe the outside of the toilet bowl right to the floor including the plumbing at the back.
10. Congratulations, you’re done!


(the two sponge technique - one damp sponge dipped in baking soda, one sponge rung out with white vinegar, put the vinegar one on top of the baking soda one and wipe, using the pressure of your hand to squeeze the vinegar into the baking soda).

Personally, the toilet is one place I don't use baking soda and vinegar ... but I'm sure it would work. On that note, I am really delighted to see that Ecostore have changed the formulation for their previously useless toilet cleaner!

More interesting posts soon!

Yours with rubber gloves on,
Gypsy xx

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Area of Play 5 - Music

photocredit:Chantelle


I should have been a groupie. I am like a puppy dog in my adoration for those with musical talent. I am in desperate envy of my jazz singer friend who can mesmerize a room of children (and me) with her singing. I find myself gazing longingly at my friend's husband who settles his babies to sleep with his guitar. In my younger days I fell in love with a guy when he serenaded me with his clarinet (a surprisingly sexy instrument), and another who made up songs for me on the piano ... and don't get me started on boys in bands.

Alas I'm not much of a musician myself ... given a choice, I will listen to National Radio rather than a music station ... and faced with an array of musical instruments I just freeze. This makes doing music with kids a little bit intimidating.

"Get to know the (musical) equipment well yourself. Try out all the instruments and find what different sounds you can make. Be alert for spontaneous music play ...' Maureen Woodhams, Making Music With Children.

Playcentre, Montessori and Steiner/Waldorf all have very different approaches to musical education for preschoolers ... and given my own dunce status I hesitate to assume any authority here. So, as always, comments and debate always welcome!

photocredit:anonymous


"Become attentive to what the children are doing musically, both in focused music sessions and in their general play. This may involve stopping being active yourself so you can spend a few minutes just watching and listening. Children often chant or sing a pattern of words or a snatch of tune, especially during solitary play... musical interactions, like conversation, often occur while adults and children are doing something else together and are a joy when you start to notice and extend them." Maureen Woodhams

Playcentre

photocredit: KarmieC


In a Playcentre, the 'music area' will usually be well resourced with a range of musical instruments - shakers, tambourines, drums, ukuleles, perhaps an old piano. There will usually be a CD player and a collection of recorded kids music ... which will often play loudly during the session.

Adults are encouraged to recognise when children show an interest in the music area, and play along side them, exploring the different instruments, dancing and singing.

"The provision of an attractive display of musical instruments and objects ensures that children have independent access to some music experiences whenever they choose. It also ensures that when a play interaction takes a musical turn, or an adult sees a way to extend a child's learning following a music interest, some materials which might support this are directly to hand. Maureen Woodhams


Steiner/Waldorf

As in all areas of play, Waldorf education is concerned with protecting and nurturing the senses, so in this instance it’s the sense of hearing. As children's hearing develops, they need first of all to hear real, living, human sounds - voices of course, and clapping rhythms are often considered very appropriate. The pentatonic scale is recommended for the early years -this has five pitches per octave and sounds lighter and more 'floaty' somehow.

You won't see many, if any, musical instruments in a Steiner/Waldorf kindergarten. Carrie was very kind to share some excerpts from 'In a Nutshell' with me that explain why.

"Because we prefer to offer the children open-ended play materials- that is, materials which can be used in many different ways, according to the child's needs of the moment - we also do not provide many of the traditional rhythm toys. However, some teachers do have bells, gourds or perhaps a drum or pentatonic xylophone available in the classroom.....It is important that these instruments produce a good quality sound, and in the case of the xylophone, that the notes are in tune. The children may play freely with these instruments, as long as they treat them with appropriate care and the sounds do not become disruptive to the mood of the classroom" Nancy Foster, In a Nutshell


Montessori

You might say that if Steiner/Waldorf is concerned with protecting the senses, Montessori is concerned with perfecting them. I think no where is this more obvious than with music.

In the Montessori 3-6 programme, children are given materials to encourage them to listen carefully and learn to differentiate not only different sounds, but different pitches too. Games such as sorting objects by sound, recognising pitch using glasses of water, or the Montessori bells encourage this precision.

Making a joyful noise




photocredit:Melissa


Of course, what these three very different approaches have in common is seeking to encourage and develop a sense of musical appreciation in our children (so they can be groupies too!). I love the idea of teaching listening skills in Montessori, I love that the Steiner approach doesn't abuse a child's ears with tinny poppy kiddy music, and I love that Playcentre lets kids really have fun and enjoy music in all its wonderful guises. After all, banging pots and pans in the kitchen is as much a music lesson as anything else! Children love and deserve the opportunity to listen to live music where possible, and to experiment with making their own music too.

So, a few fun ideas for bringing music into your pre-schoolers home!

- sing all the time. Have special songs for special times of the day, and lots of songs just because. Don't worry that you can't sing in tune, honestly, your child won't mind!

- make lots of 'ad hoc' instruments. Bang pots, put small objects in glass jars (with supervision), fill glasses with water and tap them with spoons.

- play silence games ... encourage your children to listen to the quieter sounds around them.

- take your children to see live music - buskers, brass bands, folk bands playing at the markets ... start asking about where you might be able to find real instruments being played

Enjoy!




photocredit:Rodent

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery

I'm sure I've mentioned before how much I love Nicole's 'Planning with Kids' blog ... it is hugely inspiring. One of her regular posts is her monthly review, which usually motivates me to jot down a list of my goals for the month too.

Up till now I have just been too embarassed to post, as I just wasn't achieving anything other than feeding, clothing and occassionally cleaning up after the children. But, spring has given me new motivation ... and I am really keen to keep going with it!

So, in the spirit of public accountability here is my 'Monthly Review' for September:

Goals for September

- Organise wardrobe
Did this - and its wonderful! No longer do I have to wade through all my preggie clothes every time I need a clean pair of jeans, or a change of pyjamas at 3 in the morning when the baby has spilled up all over me. However, I now have a very large bag of clothes that need sorting through to dump/sell.

- Create a plan for TradeMe selling
Did this - and managed to sell about 5 'lots' so far. I have another 12 lots to go, plus all those old maternity/fat clothes ... but progress has been made. (this was on my to-do list back in May, so good to finally get some traction).

- Organise medicine cabinets
- Done ... I can't tell you the joy these give me when I open them! (yes, I'm really THAT sad!)

- Organise linen cupboard
- Done, and in the progress I found a whole pile of cloth wipes, saving me a big of money as I thought I was going to have to buy some more.

- Stick to grocery budget, implement 3 weekly shopping
- FAIL FAIL FAIL. Bad bad month for grocery shopping, and the worst thing is I didn't even realise till I did our monthly financial spreadsheet.

Goals for October

- write 2 more 'areas of play' posts. one on music, the other on either creativity or blockplay, depending on what books I can access.

- stick to grocery budget - strictly. Still working on how to do this - thinking about taking Sophie Gray's advice on a 'cash budget' - but detailed menu planning will be a part of this.

- bring Little Guys' baby book up to date.

- write list of Christmas gifts and stick to a maximum of $15 per person for gifts.

- organise spare room wardrobe. This is the last of my decluttering projects, but for some reason I am putting it off.

- get at least 8 more listings up on TradeMe

So, what's on your 'workplan' for the month ahead?

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Toddler snacks and lunches

For some reason, I find lunch the hardest meal of the day. If Munchkin and I had our way, we would have sushi every day ... but the budget of doom doesn't allow it and my one attempt at making it was an un-mitigated disaster. I love cooking, but I'm rubbish at anything fiddly and sushi is definately fiddly.


From time to time we fall into the trap of having marmite or peanut butter sandwiches every day for a week or so, which quickly gets boring, and means that I am personally starving my 4pm and start eating everything in the cupboard (including peanut butter by the spoonful). So, as a general rule I do try to put a bit of effort in. (as always, my apologies for my dreadful photos but I thought they might give you some ideas!)




While I do often bake little things for snacks and lunches (I must get around to posting some recipes), a lot of the time I want things that are really simple and quick. In the interests of nutrition I very loosely aim for a mix of proteins, carbohydrates, vegetables and fruit. I thought I would share my 'master list' of lunch ideas, many of which double up for snacks.


Protein
- hardboiled eggs
- omelette strips
- canned tuna or salmon
- freedom farms shaved ham (hooray, you can now buy this at the supermarket)
- leftover meat especially sausages
- cubes of cooked tofu that has been marinated in a little soy sauce
- chickpeas whole or as hummus
- chunks of edam cheese
- yoghurt (great for dipping fruit)
- feta cheese
- fried haloumi cheese


Carbohydrate
- pita bread triangles
- small sandwiches with marmite, jam or honey
- baby pinwheels (cut crusts off a slice of bread, butter it, roll it up and slice it)
- pasta - penne or spirals
- couscous (best eaten outside - its really messy!)
- israeli couscous
- breakfast cereal
- bagel slices
- mini crackers
- new potatoes (cold with mayonnaise for mummy!)
- pastry shapes


Vegetables
- avocado chunks
- cucumber slices
- cherry tomatoes
- frozen peas
- broccoli (my daughter loves broccolli so we eat it A LOT)
- grated carrot
- bell peppers (red, yellow and orange are the sweetest)
- grated beetroot, carrot and apple mixed together
- sweetcorn

Fruit
- apples
- pears
- mandarin segments
- grapes
- banana slices
- persimmon slices
- gorgeous summer stuff like strawberries and blueberries
- tinned peaches, pears or pineapple
- kiwifruit
- dried apricots, sultanas or apples

Leave me a comment and let me know whats on your lunch table at the moment.